10 Bizarre Action Figures

By January 8, 2013

There are incredibly awesome and collectible action figures and then there are the ‘WTF were they thinking when they produced this?’ ones. This is a list of the latter kind. And the truth is…I actually kinda, sorta want them all. Here’s a look at 10 totally bizarre action figures.

Django Unchained Slaves

Okay,  let’s start with the newest WTF action figures. The release of these figures are creating a huge stir on the internet…for obvious reasons.  I mean there’s just something a little bit off about buying a slave doll. Agree?

Snoop Dogg

Blunts and Cheesy Gordita Crunch sold separately.

Skidmark-G.I. Joe

What…was Sergeant Shart already taken? Needless to say this doll is Al Roker’s favorite.

Gay Bob

Kind of gives new meaning to action figure, ’cause you KNOW Bob is getting some. Even with those ill-fitting pleated pants. Maybe he needs them a little roomy for Bob Jr.?


I mean I like watching WWII docs on The History Channel just as much as the next grandpa, but I don’t want a display full of evil decorating my breakfast nook.

Aunt May

What the hell did the character of Aunt May ever do to the designer of this doll?? It looks more like Aunt Gary Busey.

Beach Spider-Man

If you’re a superhero is going to the beach really an adventure? I’m also thinking the creator has no concept of what Spider-Man’s body is supposed to look like. Must have had a buttload of Hulk Hogan action figures to recycle.

The Slab Of Meat From Rocky

Warning: choking hazard. Don’t eat  this thing that LOOKS LIKE DELICIOUS MEAT!?!

Fisto- Masters Of The Universe

Um…he has a really big fist that he will…pound you with. Calm down up there, Gay Bob!

George Lucas Stormtrooper

Oh the fun I would have if I got my hands on this one! Gotta love his 1970’s Playgirl makeover. I can totally picture him lying nude on a Tauntaun skin rug. Oh man why did I have to picture that?

Any bizarre action figures I forgot? Let us know in the comments!

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Desi Jedeikin

Desi Jedeikin

Desi Jedeikin is a Los Angeles based writer and performer. She has appeared in numerous sketch comedy/improv shows at venues in L.A., including the Groundlings Theater, Comedy Central Stage, and the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, where she played Squeaky Fromme in the infamous alternative comedy show Comedy Death Ray. Unfinished projects include a memoir and a musical based on the life and death of JonBenet Ramsey. She has lots of other brilliant ideas she might complete. She really just needs more encouragement. You can follow Desi on Twitter: @Desijedeikin Here: truecrimejunkie.com And here too: xoJane.com She likes being followed.