Did y’all have a nice Father’s Day? I hope so. You know who didn’t have a nice Father’s Day? Tywin Lannister. *Does a little victory dance* Kind of loving Father’s Day “Game of Thrones”-style, aren’t you? But we have a lot of great stuff to get to first, in what was definitely a jam-packed season finale.
First up we’re at The Wall in the aftermath of The Battle of Castle Black! Jon Snow goes on his suicide mission to kill Mance Rayder, but he’s a bit stymied when Rayder is all reasonable, offering a peace pact. The negotiations and potential assassination are interrupted though, by – of all people – Stannis Baratheon and his troops! Jon Snow introduces himself as Ned Stark’s son, bolsters the ego of the unsure King Stannis, and then ironically saves Rayder’s life. I love Stannis’ expression whenever someone agrees that he’s the king. He always looks so damn surprised.
Then we have a mass funeral pyre for all, led by the still alive Maester Aemon, for all of the dead Night’s Watch brothers. Jon Snow gives Ygritte her own private send-off in the “true north.” He cries. We cry. It feels good.
Meanwhile at King’s Landing, The Mountain is still barely alive and getting some questionable old school medical treatments that are approved by Cersei. Then she’s off to stand up to her father, the first of his children to betray him. Who knew it wouldn’t be the worst thing to happen to Tywin this episode? She tells him she will not be marrying Loras Tyrell and oh yeah, the rumors are true – Tommen is Jaime’s son.
Then she goes and finds her brother/lover Jaime and tells him what she’s done. He’s shocked but turned on by it all. Same.
Then they do it and I feel weird for finding it kind of hot, because incest.
We get a single Dany scene, where she’s still doing her boring queenly duties. But uh oh, a man brings in a child that one of her dragons BBQed. She has no choice but to chain them, before jumping online and ordering a copy of “How To Train Your Dragon,” or whatever the Westeros version of that would be. It’s weird to have a finale without an amazing Dany scene, but the writers make up for that in a major way. And here we go…
Jaime sets Tyrion free! The plan is that Tyrion will go to Varys, who will help him escape King’s Landing. But you know what they say about the best laid plans? Poor Jaime…Tyrion just keeps blowing his practical plans left and right. And this blown plan is even more destructive than the trial one.
Before Tyrion goes looking for Varys, he goes looking for his father. But when he enters his father’s chambers he finds – gulp – Shae. They fight, and it’s a fight that ends with Shae being strangled by Tyrion with her necklace. “I’m sorry,” he says after the brutal death scene. I believe him, but still.
Then he grabs Joffrey’s crossbow and is off to find his father. Things aren’t looking good for Tywin at this point. Tyrion finds Tywin on the chamber pot. Oh boy. Something about this scenario is familiar.
Uh oh, indeed. They discuss Shae and Tywin calls her a whore, which Tyrion forbids him do again. It’s cute that he’s still protective of the woman that he just murdered. Then Tywin switches tactics: he makes the case that he was never going to allow Tyrion to be beheaded, yada yada yada. “I’d never let Illyn Payne take your head. You’re a Lannister. You’re my son.” Ugh. Then he calls Shae a whore again and Tyrion shoots him. Yep. Tywin switches gears again, in the worst way possible.
Bye bye Tywin, you evil bastard.
Then Tyrion finally goes to Varys, who puts him in a shipping crate and then makes the last minute decision to leave King’s Landing with Tyrion. Wow wee. Tyrion makes quite an exit, huh?
In other news, the Bran storyline finally gets GOOD. Bran and his gang are attacked by some scary ass wights (minions of the white walkers). The whole thing is like a very awesome tribute to stop-motion guru Ray Harryhausen. Sadly, Jojen is gruesomely stabbed by a wight before a little girl calls for Bran and his peeps to join her. The whole gang follows, leaving Jojen behind after exploding his body.
But who is this little badass girl? She is one of “The Children.” She takes Bran to see the Three-eyed Raven, an old man who tells Bran “I’ve been watching you, all of you, all of your lives. You’ll never walk again, but you will fly.” Cool! Looking forward to seeing where this goes next season!
In the night’s other big scene, Brienne and Pod meet up with The Hound and Arya. It’s a bad night for people taking dumps.
It starts off cool enough. Arya has found a definite role model in Brienne, but then The Hound steps out and Brienne starts putting two and two together. I like all of these characters and didn’t want anything bad to happen to any of them. Can’t we all just get along? Nope.
Brienne and The Hound have an epically brutal fight that ends with The Hound going off a cliff. Arya hides and Brienne searches for her, to no avail. When the coast is clear, Arya goes to The Hound and I ain’t gonna lie, this scene is gut-wrenching. He tells Arya to go with Brienne and then asks her to kill him. “Go on, girl. Another name off your list.” But Arya takes his silver and leaves him to die. WTF?
That was cold. I’ll miss “The Hound and Arya” show. But such is life in Westeros, I guess! I’m definitely not cut out for it!
The episode ends with Arya on a ship headed to Braavos, which she paid for with the coin that was given to her by the “Faceless Man” assassin back in season 2. “Valar Morghulis, ” she says. All men must die. Even you, Tywin!
And I’m already dying for season 5 to begin!
What did you think of the season 4 finale? Let us know in the comments!
Latest posts by Desi Jedeikin (see all)
- ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 10 Recap: “The Children” - June 16, 2014
- ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 9 Recap: “The Watchers on the Wall” - June 9, 2014
- ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 8 Recap: “The Mountain And The Viper” - June 2, 2014
- Adam McKay Probably Won’t Direct ‘Ant-Man’ - June 1, 2014
- James Mangold In Talks To Direct Biopic About Football Star Joe Namath - May 29, 2014