Joseph Fiennes Has Been Cast As Michael Jackson. We’re Not Kidding.

By January 27, 2016

Ok, I’m about to write something very weird. You’re going to read it, and it’s probably going to hurt your brain. But just know that every word I’m about to write, while completely bats*** crazy, is also totally true. You ready? Here we go.

British actor Joseph Fiennes has been cast in the role of late pop star Michael Jackson in a made-for-TV comedy movie called Elizabeth, Michael, & Marlon that will detail a road trip the singer allegedly took with Elizabeth Taylor and Marlon Brando following the 9/11 terrorist attacks.

Got all that? That’s a real thing that’s happening.

The story goes that after 9/11, the three celebrities jumped in a car and tried to drive from New York to California since air travel was so heavily restricted at the time. Whether or not this trip actually happened has never actually been confirmed, though a former employee of Michael Jackson does insist they got as far as Ohio before turning around. So…picture that. Michael Jackson, Elizabeth Taylor, and Marlon Brando together in a car driving across the country. That’s crazy enough on its own.

But, of course, then came the casting news. Joseph Fiennes as Michael Jackson. You’ll be shocked (SHOCKED!) to learn that some people on the internet have a problem with a white, British actor being cast as an African-American. Given the controversy of #OscarsSoWhite, you can see how some people might be a bit sensitive to this sort of thing. On the one hand, I totally get it. On the other hand, by September 2001 Michael Jackson was whiter than me. But yes, given the landscape of Hollywood today and the sensitivity over racial inequality, the question of how a British guy can play an African-American guy (keep in mind this is being made for British TV, not American) is a very big one. But I don’t really feel like going down that particular rabbit hole at the moment. There’s a much bigger question that needs to be addressed here, which is…

Why in the blue hell is this an actual thing that’s being made for people to watch? I mean…really? This is going to be a thing? I mean, yes, this is very much going to be a thing. This will be the next big overblown TV event. Because now EVERYONE’S going to watch it, whether it be out of curiosity or hatred or just because it’s what all the folks on Twitter are doing. This is the new Sharknado, and we’re all just going to have to deal with its stupid existence. Thanks a lot, Britain.

Elizabeth, Michael & Marlon stars Joseph Fiennes, Brian Cox, and Stockard Channing (hey, that’s actually a pretty good cast). It will air on British channel Sky Arts some time this year.

Make sure to keep checking back for updates – right here on GeekNation.


Joe Ruggirello
Joe is a writer, retired comedian, and giant nerd. He's particularly fond of comic books, pro wrestling, and Godzilla. Oh, and that Star Wars thing. You can yell at him on Twitter @JoeRu23.