Guys, I know. Nobody releasing a movie right now is a smart person. Freaking STAR WARS just came out and is old-school Mike Tyson style knocking box office records the eff out. They are also taking up massive amounts of screens at theaters to project their glorious film upon the our thankful eyes. That being said, a whopping seven movies are releasing or expanding this week. Someone get that guy from Empire Strikes Back to drop his deadpan:
“Two fighters against a Star Destroyer???”
Even though some of them are sure to get blown up Death Star style, let’s take a look at Christmas movie releases together.
The Hateful Eight – Directed by Quentin Tarantino, were this a wide release it may be the best suitor to actually steal some of the Star Wars audience. However, it will be shown on 100 screens in glorious 70MM including a longer version as well as an old-school style intermission. Lucky movie-goers around these theaters will be in for a one of a kind “roadshow” movie going experience. This would be my personal pick were it playing anywhere close to me, dammit.
Daddy’s Home – This one should be releasing wide and re-teams the hilarious duo from The Other Guys. Hopefully it holds more gems like Mark Wahlberg screaming “I’m a peacock you gotta let me FLY!!!” I’ll be making time to check this one out even if the trailer did look almost too over the top.
Concussion – This one may have taken a hit in recent weeks with the focus of the “based on a true story” aspect of the movie coming into question. Apparently Dr. Bennet Omalu who will be played in an Oscar turn attempt from Will Smith has claimed he was the first to discover CTE (A football related brain trauma) and went on to fight the NFL trying to get awareness raised. Recently however other Doctors in his field have come out saying that’s false and that he merely named it. Omalu describes this as just another paranoid attempt to discredit him from the NFL. Drama! Either way if your looking for a medical based fight the system drama instead of intergalactic warfare this may be your ticket.
That movie that calls itself Point Break – This is one I won’t mind watching get left in the dust by the Millenium Falcon. It’s a wide release. For some reason. You can’t bring back the Swayze/Keanu without the Swayze/Keanu. But some people just want to watch the world burn. In the words of Blade “Some mother *******’s always tryna’ ice-skate uphill” This was apparently so bad they cancelled their critics screenings. Someone’s probably going to need to plan a daring robbery just to get back the cash they burned on this.
Joy – Directed by the dude that always seems to make good movies (Sanz that weird one with Jake Gyllenhaal and Cyclops) David O. Russell (Silver Linings Playbook) and re-teaming up the successful duo of J-Law and B-Coop (Sorry about that whole B-Coop thing. That was dumb and I’m ashamed of myself) This movie is about a woman having a hard time in life before becoming powerful af. Currently sitting at a 63% this one may be worth checking out if it’s in your area.
The Revenant – Leo is working for that Oscar, dammit. Including actually eating raw bison liver and enduring some gnarly conditions. This one also stars Tom Hardy and is about a man attacked by a bear, left for dead and surviving the worst conditions ever. This not only is Directed by last years Best Picture winning Director, but is also a nice pick for the “Forget Star Wars, I want to watch something that makes me need a shower” crowd. It looks visually amazing and well acted for anyone lucky enough to have it playing in your area.
The Big Short – This is Oscar week b*tches! Good lord there’s a plentiful feast of talented cast members in this one about what an a-hole banks can be. This one comes out on the 23rd and stars (Deep inhale) Christian Bale, Brad Pitt, Steve Carell AND Ryan Gosling. Sorry ladies, they made them all look ugly. It’s also directed by Anchorman Director Adam McKay and is definitely on my list of Christmas releases to check out. It’s a wide release as well!
Naturally I will also be checking out The Force Awakens again (and again) but at-least this week movie-goers will have something other than Alvin and the Chipmunks to hit up if it’s sold out. What will you be seeing this week? I’ll be living at the theater apparently!
Happy Holiday movie week from everyone at GeekNation!
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