To be perfectly honest, I gave up on MTV and their award shows (both Music AND Movie) around 10 years ago when they themselves gave up on quality music programming and sold their souls to reality television; thus going from the awesomely awesome “Music Television” to “Moron Television.”
I had zero plans to watch this year’s MTV Movie Awards up until a month ago when it was revealed plus-size Australian darling Rebel Wilson (Bridesmaids, Pitch Perfect) would be hosting, then thought “Yeah, I’m DEFINITELY watching this.”
Although last night turned out to be a fairly weird and slightly awkward awards show, Rebel Wilson kept it going like a champ.
There’s a few fun highlights that I’m SURE are all over the internets by now…so I’ma give out my OWN award – The Crixie.
And The Crixie goes to…
Best “Honored Award Winner” Introduction: Peter Dinklage introduces this year’s Comedic Genius winner Will Ferrell
When Elf co-star Peter Dinklage hit the stage to introduce the first Comedic Genius recipient Will Ferrell, there were a few things he wanted you to know…with HILARIOUS results
Rebel Wilson referring to Game Of Thrones as “Dragons and Ti**ies” made me laugh till I coughed.
Best Fast Finger Five-Second Delay Challenge: Samuel L. Jackson
Now EVERYBODY knows by now that if it’s not a “we must be taken seriously and dress up in a tuxedo” award show, Samuel L. Jackson does not give two f*&$s if it’s live TV or not. And in true BAMF fashion, not only did he and Jamie Foxx win the “Best WTF?! Moment” for Django Unchained but he also decided to give the guy with the finger on the five-second delay trigger a run for his money as he proceeded to say Mother Trucker (only substitute the “T” and “R” for an “F”) during their speech and pretty much whenever they were silly enough to put him on camera.
You go, Sam!
Best Use Of Nanny Cam/Best Upstaging: Rebel Wilson’s Koala “Chlamydia” vs. Beasts Of The Southern Wild‘s Quevenzhane Wallis
Speaks for itself…and is adorable
Best REAL “WTF?” Moment: Aubrey “Hot Liquor Breath” Plaza tries to smash and grab Will Ferrell’s Comedic Genius award.
Okay, so we’re all used to weird things happening at award shows but this is one for the record books. As Ferrell was giving his acceptance speech (decked out in a dolla dolla billz suit that would make Snoop and Bishop Don Magic Juan proud), a CLEARLY D.A.F (Drunk As F*&#) Aubrey Plaza from Parks and Recreation (complete with her upcoming movie’s hashtag “#TheToDoList” written on her chest in black ink) cautiously staggered to the stage and this happened:
The NANOsecond I saw bare feet, I knew some shiz was about to go down and she looked scared as hell. Plaza was shown the door soon after but tweeted about the “Kanye” moment later in the evening.
Best “F All The Haters And Just Be Yourself” Speech: Emma Watson
Hard to believe that Emma Watson’s been acting for the last 14 years and fans around the world watched her go from kinky haired little girl to the young beauty she is now…but what REALLY blew me away was her acceptance speech for the Trailblazer Award. I’m not gonna say anymore about it, just let it inspire you.
Keep your eye on this girl, she’s gonna win an Oscar someday.
Best “Shirtless Oscar” Speech: Taylor Lautner
When Twilight star Taylor Lautner won the Best Shirtless award, he decided to be himself and show the world what he looks like when he’s not working out (much to the giggles of presenters Zac Efron, Seth Rogen and Danny McBride).
He’s only 21?! Great googly moogly, I’m old.
Best Use Of Social Media/Where Nerds Rule: Bilbo Baggins wins Best Hero
If you’re wondering why you saw hashtags like “#VoteBilbo” fly across your Twitter feed the last three weeks, it’s because MTV took to Twitter to see who deserved to be known as Best Hero. You wouldn’t think Bilbo Baggins could beat the likes of The Hulk, Catwoman, The Dark Knight or Iron Man (I don’t even rate Kristen Stewart’s Snow White in this) but when the smoke cleared, it was indeed the Hobbit that started it all that came out on top.
That’s what I’M talkin ’bout, Willis!
Best Future Husband Wins Best Villain: Tom Hiddleston (The Avengers)
The Avengers took home Best Fight (because when it’s seven vs one, it BETTER win Best Fight) and Best Film but it was when my future husband Tom Hiddleston took home Best Villain for his role as Loki, I KNEW I was gonna give him some lovin here.
I would donate $1000 to charity for a 5 minute hug from this man. I heart him so muchy.
Best Shout Out (without ACTUALLY being there): Lena Dunham
While the Girls star may not have been in attendance, she received a couple of shout outs for her knack of freely getting naked on the hit HBO show from the likes Taylor Lautner and others.
Best “Oh My God, Dad!” Moment: Jamie Foxx
When Jamie Foxx took the stage to pick up his Generation Award, he not only urged people to never give up, he also proudly gave his family (all in the audience) shout outs. But it was when he pointed out his 19-year-old daughter (who was also his date), her choice of dress and her reaction that made me laugh.
Jamie Foxx, you keep on keepin’ on, playa.
Best PSA (EVER): Rebel Wilson
Rebel Wilson gets seriously serious about body image (kind of)
Best Use Of Cosplay: Rebel Wilson as Iron Mangina
Come on, it’s awesome and you f’n KNOW it; I expect to see at LEAST 3 of these at Comic Con this year.
Well, those are my awards but here’s a complete list of the ACTUAL award winners who went home with a golden popcorn:
Best Hero: Bilbo Baggins – The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
Best Kiss: Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper, Silver Linings Playbook
Best Villain: Tom Hiddleston, The Avengers
Best Fight: Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johansson and Jeremy Renner v. Tom Hiddleston – The Avengers
Best WTF Moment: Jamie Foxx and Samuel L. Jackson, Django Unchained
Best Male: Bradley Cooper, Silver Linings Playbook
Best Movie (as voted by the fans): The Avengers, directed by Joss Whedon
Best Female: Jennifer Lawrence, Silver Linings Playbook
Scared (crazy) Moment: Suraj Sharma, Life of Pi
Breakthrough Performance: Rebel Wilson, Pitch Perfect (YAY!)
Best On-Screen Duo: Mark Wahlberg and Seth MacFarlane, Ted
Best Musical Moment: Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Anna Camp, Brittany Snow, Alexis Knapp, Ester Dean and Hana Mae Lee, Pitch Perfect
Generation Award: Jamie Foxx
Comedic Genius: Will Ferrell (is also the first recipient of said award)
Trailblazer Award: Emma Watson
And there you have it! Another MTV Movie Awards in the books and while a little awkward at times, I’d watch it again…but ONLY if Rebel comes back to host.
Until next year, darlings.
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